RSM Service
  They're supposed to be delivering the mail!

An email travelling from London to New York whizzes down fibre optic cables under the Atlantic ocean at a blistering four hundred and thirty six million miles per hour; just thirty five percent slower than the speed of light. Our snails travel at, well... a snail's pace - 0.0023 miles per hour. If they were to attempt the same journey, across a land bridge, it would take them 171 years 40 weeks and 2 days. Of course we're not going to ask them to do the whole journey, that would be silly and anyway they only live for three years. No, all we ask of our snails is to carry each email 50cm across their enclosure. This should take just over 8 minutes but as you can see in the image of Agatha and Reginald racing towards this freshly placed marigold, they have other things on their mind.
  Five Star Accommodation
As Beatrice and Fred play together in the pool they have no idea how lucky they are. The big outdoors can be a dangerous place for a snail. At boredomresearch we think we understand creativity and innovation quite well but our endeavours pale into insignificance when compared to that of the common gardener. The defence of exotic plants has engendered a crusade against all animals with less than two feet. When it comes to the task of maiming and slaughtering snails the inventiveness of the gardener knows no bound. Stamping, crushing, chopping, salting, poisoning, trapping and drowning have no place in the Real Snail Mail enclosure. Having appeared on premiere TV and printed media all around the world our snails are treated like the celebrities they are.